The Worries of Perfection
by DoReMe22
Summary: Those seemingly perfect girls of the Pretty Committee have their own issues and insecurities too, even though they sometimes smash them down as much as they can. In what will probably be mostly poems, these smashed down problems are opened up.
1. Dylan Marvil: Maybe, Maybe Not Fat

**Disclaimer:** All rights go to the author, Lisi Harrison, who faithfully publishes my not-so-secret guilty pleasure(and Dylan Marvil, of course).

Maybe, Maybe Not Fat 

I never said there was anything wrong with food.

There isn't. I love food.

It warms me up, turns me round, and makes me smile

Gushing chocolate, frothy vanilla slurps, and golden pizza grease...

Yum, yum, yum all the way through.

I never said there was anything wrong with food.

But there's a hell of a lot of things wrong with me.

A lot of me.

Much too much of always-eating me

I'm just fat

Yeah, yeah

I know I'm not a complete blubbery blob monster

Sliding OCD to a tilt as I tromp down one corner of the building

I think that's what the Pretty Committee guesses I mean

When I trade my Hershey bars for Nutrigrain

But honestly I get that Fat Camp was a bit of a stretch

And compared to the LBRs at my school

Fat is a strong word

But when I compare me

To Queen Massie

And the rest of the effortlessly slim and toned PC

Fat, flabby, and all the Fs in the book

Match me spot-on

Do you know what its like

Being the fiercely red-haired, red-faced fat girl

Out of them?

All either sporting rose cream, Pilates abs

Or boasting pencil-thin thighs by the pool

These tiny butted, Gawd graced friends of mine

Are physically flawless

Boy-melting moguls

That make me

Look like a salami stick

Pretending be a rose stem

And they don't get it!

How can they get it

When they don't have to try?

"Dylan! Stop whining!"

"Lay off the diet, Dyl, and have some fun."

"For the hundreth time, YOU'RE NOT FAT!"

Don't they see the huuuge difference between

My arm beside Claire's?

My bathing suit bod next to Massie's?

My calves compared to Kristen's?

We and I both know that they're not blind.

They wonder why I insist to choke down bran

When they make me feel like an ogre

At Friday Night Sleepovers, most of the time its only me

Scooping a finger through the whipped cream

As amber eyes flash wide horror

Black-haired beauties slowly shake their heads

Dylan, Dylan, _Dylan  
_

And I don't even know what I want sometimes

When I let my sisters eat my ice cream.

A thing to do, a thing to be?

Maybe a HAWT boyfriend

Who looks at me like I'm the best

Instead of Shrek.

Or it could be that

I just want to be more of a Massie

More fitting of the Pretty Committee

A ten among tens

Instead a pathetic seven

Of course, Massie being the alpha doesn't bug me

Much

But I could do without her

"Thank Gawd she's put down the popcorn" glances

And the way she sometimes scans me up and down

Red lights zip, zip over the bar code

Searches herself, then mutely back to me

Nods, smiles, and flounces ahead.

As if to say,

"Dylan's looks bloated and blotchy again.

Glad to be me, a total ten and _skinny_."

So that might not be what she really thinks.

So what.

Maybe I'm paranoid, maybe I'm fat

Maybe I'm not.

But those looks,

Alicia's loop-da-loop eye rolls,

Claire's shy glances from me to her gummies,

And Kristen's offers to teach me "calorie-burning" soccer

Don't help me chew and swallow

The food I love

Any easier.


	2. Claire Lyons: Slinky Down the Stairs

**Slinky Down the Stairs**

Is it good?

To stand where I stand

To be Me

That likes to play Slinky

First waving over in silver bridges

Only to slam against a stair

Collapse and shrink, shrink, shrink

Then backbend over again

Rebirth

Leads into the crumple, the scramble

Find my feet

Tip over the edge

Hope that this time around

I'll fly

Instead of hit the floor

The Me that is whole

Perfectly licked, sealed, and stamped

Not a cloud in the sky

Not a chip in the polish

Appears full moon shine

Whenever and always

Cam says I'm his girl

Whenever his one green eye smiles

While the blue other winks

Whenever that last, winning goal

Kisses the net in honor

Of whole and happy

Me

The Me that is broken

Shattered glass

Cracked egg

Peeling away, layer by layer

Appears all too often

Ultra-violet power

Whenever and always

Candies trade sides

Whenever I'm the evil stepmother to his baby

Whenever he cozies up to replacement blondes

Smashes gifts

Dodges arrows

And makes me fall to sleep

In tears

Cam can be lovely

All smiles

Red roses

Sweetly-sent IMs

And because he is so lovely

That when he trips up

Or when I trip up

And things seem to explode

I can't help but to lose that grip

Massie insists I must never let go

But how I can help from crying

When the boy that belongs to my side

As if we were two magnetic halves

Of a whole

Tries to find someone better

Doesn't always chin me up

But crash me down

I know it isn't his fault

It's mine and ours both

We're just so...so

Confusing

But I still wish

I wasn't Me

Who needed the someone who hurt her most

Who forgave and forgot

The scars that really dug deep

I wish that Me, that I, that whatever

Would pick

Up or down

Would either stay soaring

Be with the Cam that captured her smiles

Or simply stick to the ground

Say enough is enough

Clean a slate and refuse to scratch him back

Impossible, of course.

Cam is now

A part of Me

I couldn't erase him if I tried

But even though things are

Today

Golden and Cloud Nine

Tomorrow I'm sure

Will send me puffy-eyed and stuffy-nosed

Running all the way home

From the big bad Cam I love

Like the last little pig.


	3. Massie: Remember Still the Queen

**Remember Still the Queen**

Try to forget that today ever happened

It didn't

It's gone now

Not even a thing of the past

A thing of non-existence

[

[

Try to forget that there's another tomorrow

No one's going to be there

No one will trace your steps down the hallways

And even if they do

They'll be secretly ahh-doring your shoes

Instead of secretly wishing that you'd

Topple down the stairs

[

[

Try to forget that your best friends

Wanted nothing to do with you

Crippled you down

With frostier glares

Then even you could manage

[

[

Try to forget that he didn't want you

Piss off

As if he said that

Please

I still love you Block, even if no one else does.

Or at least, that's what he meant.

[

[

Remember that your still Bean's Mommy

Daddy's precious little princess

A heart-stopping fashion oracle

And hey, Todd still thinks you're hot

[

[

Remember that your still the queen

In all your deep purple royalty

You have riches

You have the beauty

What does it matter

If your subjects spit on your crown?

[

[

Just remember you'll be asleep soon

Caught between the horror of today

That didn't happen

And the doom of tomorrow

That won't happen

[

[

Just drift in the unconscious moment

Where no one storms your marble towers

And red splashes at your feet

Not rotten tomatoes, but gorgeous roses

Everyone loves you

As you dream in the perfection of long yesterday

[

[

**Please, please review anything that comes to mind!**


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